Bir insan\u0131n anavatan\u0131 \u00e7ocuklu\u011fudur, der psikologlar. Ne kadar do\u011fru. Nereye gidersek gidelim, hangi mesle\u011fi se\u00e7ersek se\u00e7elim, hangi konuma gelirsek gelelim, ka\u00e7 \u00e7ocu\u011fumuz olursa olsun ondan kopam\u0131yoruz. O da bir \u015fekilde bizden kopmuyor. Hepsi yalan, sen b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fcn, kocaman adam oldun, kocaman insan oldun s\u00f6zlerinin. Bir taraf\u0131m\u0131z hep bahar kal\u0131yor, taze kal\u0131yor, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kal\u0131yor. Hep ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z ok\u015fans\u0131n istiyoruz s\u0131cak ellerle, dillerle, g\u00f6n\u00fcllerle.<\/p>\n
Ve art\u0131k baba olan ben, bug\u00fcn, i\u00e7imdeki \u00e7ocuktan \u00f6d\u00fcn\u00e7 ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m cesaretle, size babamdan bahsedece\u011fim. Bu bir ilk olacak hayat\u0131mda. Ya\u015fasayd\u0131 yazamazd\u0131m, izin vermezdi. Sevmezdi kendisinden bahsedilmeyi, \u00f6v\u00fclmeyi, riy\u00e2 gibi gelirdi ona bu. Rahmete u\u011furlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ho\u015fg\u00f6r\u00fcs\u00fcne s\u0131\u011f\u0131narak ve ruhundan istimdat ederek yaz\u0131yorum. Ellerinden \u00f6p\u00fcyorum.<\/p>\n
Herkesin unutamad\u0131\u011f\u0131 sabahlar vard\u0131r hayat\u0131nda. Kimi ku\u015f c\u0131v\u0131lt\u0131lar\u0131yla uyand\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir tatil sabah\u0131n\u0131 unutamaz, kimi deniz dalgalar\u0131n\u0131n \u00e2deta periyodik bir \u0131srarla \u2018\u2019hadi kalk, hadi kalk\u2019\u2019 dercesine \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131\u011f\u0131 sesle g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131 sabahlar\u0131\u2026 Ya ben? K\u0131rk ya\u015f\u0131ndan sonra okumay\u0131 \u00f6\u011frendi\u011fi Kur\u2019an\u2019\u0131 bir daha elinden hi\u00e7 b\u0131rakmayan babam\u0131n, her g\u00fcnayd\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda e\u011fildi\u011fi bu sayfalarda buldu\u011fu huzuru yan\u0131k sesiyle dillendirerek evi meleklerle doldurdu\u011fu ruhan\u00ee sabahlar\u0131 unutam\u0131yorum. “Dindar insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n
De\u011firmenimiz ve d\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131m\u0131z vard\u0131. Bunlar, kul hakk\u0131na dikkat etmeyi gerektiren i\u015flerdi. Zaman zaman, \u2018\u2019acaba, fark\u0131nda olmadan, insanlar\u0131n hakk\u0131 bana ge\u00e7er mi?\u2019\u2019 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesiyle bu i\u015fleri b\u0131rakmay\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fcn canl\u0131 \u015fahidiyim. “Hastal\u0131k derecesinde hassas ve d\u00fcr\u00fcst insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n
Meyve bah\u00e7esi olarak kulland\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z etraf\u0131 orman olan hemen hemen 200 d\u00f6n\u00fcml\u00fck bir arazimiz vard\u0131. Bu m\u00fclk dededen kalmayd\u0131, ortakt\u0131. Kadastro memurlar\u0131, k\u00f6y\u00fcm\u00fczden ve kom\u015fu k\u00f6yden se\u00e7ilip onlara rehberlik eden bilirki\u015filer ve dahi babam aylarca u\u011fra\u015ft\u0131lar, bir Geyve<\/a>\u2019ye, bir bah\u00e7eye gittiler geldiler. \u00c7ocuk akl\u0131mla anlamam m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fildi olanlar\u0131. Bir g\u00fcn sordum, \u00f6nce cevap vermedi, ama daha sonra k\u0131saca \u00f6zetledi ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131. R\u00fc\u015fvet istemi\u015fler babamdan, \u00e7ok da y\u00fckl\u00fc para de\u011filmi\u015f asl\u0131nda. \u0130timat etti\u011fi bir dostuna sormu\u015f. Dostu; \u2018\u2019r\u00fc\u015fvet alan da, veren de\u2026 \u2018\u2019 diye ba\u015flayan me\u015fhur hadisi okumu\u015f. \u2018\u2019E\u011fer r\u00fc\u015fvet kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131nda o yer bizim olacaksa istemiyorum.\u2019\u2019 dedi ve yakla\u015f\u0131k 200 d\u00f6n\u00fcml\u00fck yer hazineye kald\u0131. “Okuyamam\u0131\u015f ve \u015fair olamam\u0131\u015f haliydi Mehmet Akif\u2019in.”<\/p>\n Bir ara muhtarl\u0131\u011fa aday olmas\u0131 i\u00e7in \u00e7ok \u0131srar edildi. \u2018\u2019Ben sana oy vermem baba!\u2019\u2019, dedim, \u015fa\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. \u2018\u2019Ni\u00e7in?\u2019\u2019, dedi. \u2018\u2019Sen biraz fazla titiz ve d\u00fcr\u00fcsts\u00fcn de ondan.\u2019\u2019 dedim. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc, \u2018\u2019Hakl\u0131s\u0131n.\u2019\u2019 dedi. \u2018\u2019G\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz memurlar\u0131na i\u015f yapt\u0131rmak i\u00e7in onlar\u0131n dilini bilmek ve konu\u015fmak l\u00e2z\u0131m, gen\u00e7 olmak l\u00e2z\u0131m, s\u00fcrekli ko\u015fu\u015fturmak l\u00e2z\u0131m.\u2019\u2019 diye de ekledi. “Mah\u00e7up bir insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n \u0130lkokul mezunuydu, ama m\u00fckemmel bir yaz\u0131s\u0131 vard\u0131. Askerde bir komutan yaz\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fczelli\u011fini g\u00f6r\u00fcnce, \u2018\u2019Gel evlat\u2019\u2019 demi\u015f \u2018\u2019bu ellere ot yoldurmaya yaz\u0131k, seni \u00e7avu\u015f yapal\u0131m\u2026\u2019\u2019 Okumay\u0131, okuduklar\u0131n\u0131, \u00f6\u011frendiklerini dostlar\u0131yla payla\u015fmay\u0131 severdi. Hayat\u0131ndan ve okuduklar\u0131ndan dikkatini \u00e7eken noktalar\u0131, yerleri anlatmay\u0131 da. Benim anekdotlara olan d\u00fc\u015fk\u00fcnl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fcn arkas\u0131nda o varm\u0131\u015f me\u011fer.<\/p>\n Do\u011fan\u00e7ay\u2019da ayakkab\u0131 tamircili\u011fi yap\u0131yormu\u015f. (Uzun Hik\u00e2ye\u2019nin \u00e7ekildi\u011fi k\u00f6y) G\u00fcn g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f bir karakol komutan\u0131 varm\u0131\u015f bu g\u00fczel kasaban\u0131n. S\u00fcrekli babam\u0131n d\u00fckkan\u0131na u\u011frar hal hat\u0131r sorar sohbet edermi\u015f. Bir g\u00fcn ayakkab\u0131s\u0131ndaki k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir s\u00f6k\u00fc\u011f\u00fc diktirmi\u015f babama. Para uzatm\u0131\u015f. \u2018\u2019Olmaz\u2019\u2019 demi\u015f, babam. Oturmu\u015f kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na; \u2018\u2019bak\u2019\u2019 demi\u015f \u2018\u2019Selahattin, buraya d\u00fc\u015fmanlar\u0131n ve seni sevmeyenler zaten gelmez, dostlar\u0131ndan da sen para almazsan, nas\u0131l ge\u00e7ineceksin?\u2019\u2019<\/p>\n Bir de, kendisinden defalarca dinledi\u011fim Hz. Musa ile ilgili bir k\u0131ssas\u0131 vard\u0131. Hz. Musa bir g\u00fcn yolda y\u00fcr\u00fcrken pislikleri e\u015feleyen bir karga g\u00f6r\u00fcr. D\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fte ayn\u0131 karga bu sefer Kur\u2019an okumaktad\u0131r. (Babam Kur\u2019an derdi ama bu ba\u015fka bir kutsal kitap olmal\u0131\u2026) Bu duruma \u00e7ok \u015fa\u015f\u0131r\u0131r Hz. Musa. Allah\u2019a (c.c.) sorar nedenini\/hikmetini bu durumun. Cevap \u00e7ok ibret\u00e2mizdir: \u2018\u2019\u00c2hir zaman \u00fcmmetini taklit ediyor ya Musa, \u00e2hir zaman \u00fcmmetini taklit ediyor.\u2019\u2019 “Bilge insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n D\u00fczenli maa\u015f alabilece\u011fi bir i\u015finin olmas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ok istemi\u015f. Asker d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fc girdi\u011fi s\u0131navlardan hemen hepsini kazanm\u0131\u015f ama polis<\/a> olmay\u0131 tercih etmi\u015f. G\u00f6reve ba\u015flamak i\u00e7in \u0130stanbul<\/a>\u2019a yola \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f, yolda ge\u00e7irdi\u011fi kaza<\/a>onun iki sene yata\u011fa mahkum ya\u015famas\u0131na neden olmu\u015f. Tam bir trajedi olan bu kaza dilinden hi\u00e7 d\u00fc\u015fmezdi. Bahsi ba\u011flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 temel kavram hep; \u2018\u2019nasip\u2019\u2019ti. “M\u00fctevekkil insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n Geldik en \u00f6nemli noktaya. Benim edebiyat\u00e7\u0131 olmam\u0131 hi\u00e7 istemedi. Edebiyat\u00e7\u0131lar pek muteber insanlar de\u011filler, zamanla kendilerinden, milletlerinden, k\u00fclt\u00fcrlerinden, dinlerinden koparlar\u2026 derdi s\u00fcrekli. \u015eakayla kar\u0131\u015f\u0131k bir \u015fekilde s\u00f6ylerdi bunu, ama ben \u00e7ok al\u0131n\u0131rd\u0131m. Bir g\u00fcn kitaplar\u0131mdan birini kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131rken edebiyat\u0131n k\u0131rk birinci tan\u0131m\u0131yla kar\u015f\u0131la\u015fm\u0131\u015f; \u2018\u2019Edebiyat ayn\u0131 zamanda bo\u015f s\u00f6z ve palavra demektir.\u2019\u2019 Hep tak\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 bana, bo\u015f i\u015fle u\u011fra\u015f\u0131yorsun diye. “G\u00fclmeyi seven insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n Kul hakk\u0131ndan, insanlar\u0131 incitmekten, bor\u00e7tan ve \u00f6l\u00fcmden \u00e7ok korkard\u0131. Ben \u00f6l\u00fcmden o kadar korkmuyorum, \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc biliyorum ki babaannem ve babam (Ve art\u0131k cennet ku\u015fu annem) beni orada d\u00f6rt g\u00f6zle bekliyorlar. Bekleyeniniz varsa bekletmemek l\u00e2z\u0131m. “Beklemeyi sevmeyen insand\u0131.”<\/p>\n Not: Y\u0131llar \u00f6nce Bosna’da yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m yaz\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Bir insan\u0131n anavatan\u0131 \u00e7ocuklu\u011fudur, der psikologlar. Ne kadar do\u011fru. Nereye gidersek gidelim, hangi mesle\u011fi se\u00e7ersek se\u00e7elim, hangi konuma gelirsek gelelim, ka\u00e7 \u00e7ocu\u011fumuz olursa olsun ondan kopam\u0131yoruz. O da bir \u015fekilde bizden kopmuyor. Hepsi yalan, sen b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fcn, kocaman adam oldun, kocaman insan oldun s\u00f6zlerinin. Bir taraf\u0131m\u0131z hep bahar kal\u0131yor, taze kal\u0131yor, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kal\u0131yor. Hep ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z ok\u015fans\u0131n […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":907,"featured_media":31383,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[194,5],"tags":[1331,1534,1336,1535,1347,1398,1348],"class_list":["post-40952","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-guncel","category-kose-yazilari","tag-adapazari","tag-baba","tag-geyve","tag-hayatta-en-cok-babami-sevdim","tag-karacam","tag-muharrem-dayanc","tag-sakarya"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40952"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/907"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=40952"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40952\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":40953,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40952\/revisions\/40953"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/31383"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=40952"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=40952"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/karacamkoyu.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=40952"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}